It's the time of the year again~blues

It's that time of the year again whereby a new year is dawning on us. Some will feel very excited about welcoming 2010 while others will feel a little bit insecured, a little pity that 2009 is leaving, a little bit scared about the impeding new year.

Actually for me 2010 comes too fast in my opinion. You see, people like me make a list of New Year Resolutions and during the New Year 2009 I've made up a list of 10 things that I must do in 2009. Minor things and big things altogether and taking out that list today, I realised I've only fulfiled 4 of them! In fact I'm a bit panicky this morning when I looked at my list, I leave it to 4 days before 2010 to fulfil another 6 resolutions? Oh my God it is going to be a rush!

Things done so far:-

1. Fix my creaking bed, haha it is due fixing for 1 year now ~ Done in March 2009 took me 2 1/2 hours!
2. Calm down a little, be a cool head ~ Avoided unnecessary confrontation twice this year and thus avoiding the possibilities in getting into fights or arguements - Used to be a hot headed crazy maniac
3. Maintain good friendship with YSA ~ No probs, still my best friend even though he is 400 miles away
4. Get my toe done ~ Seek treatment already but still is producing crackling sound - very annoying!

Looking at the DONE list, I've actually done very little during 2009. In fact I think I'm the underachiever of the year! I'm a very busy man, but where did I spend all of my hours? I did a lot of soul searching and the conclusion is that I've wasted a lot of time playing games, watching listless tv shows, reading and re-reading automotive magazines, over-sleeping and much more. It is a failure, 2009 is a big failure for myself. Add in the fact the economy crisis, there is no pay increment for 2009 and the bonus, well the bonus is shitty! So my 2009 ended in a failure and I can no longer look back at 2009 as something that I've done positively.
I became a bit more lazy, I became nonchalant at work(for some period), I became inactive in sports, I became less socialable, I stay home more and see my parents less, I became a bit narrow minded and I failed to fulfil the 10 goals I've set myself to.

Actually I'm very deflated this morning knowing my failings. After a brief conversation with my mum I felt better. She told me it is ok that I go home less, as long as I still love them they will know. She told me that life is like this and we need to be positive about everything. She also assure me that things will be better in 2010 and I should look forward to it as a new year. Here I am, being an infillial son but my mum doesn't even care and she love me still!

An Angel to Light your way for 2010~

End of year is a time whereby everyone should do a reflection on themselves. See if they've done anything good or bad that particular year. It is also a time to forgive and seek forgiveness. If you've been bad and missed out on seeing your parents, make it a habit in 2010 to see them more often. They're not going to be here forever so appreciate them while you still can. If you've been negative this year, try to be more positive next year. If you have been lazy then try to be more hardworking.

An Angel to show you the correct path during difficult times in 2010

Every year end I do a self-reflection. I find many faults and I try to change many things. In this world as we grow older, the grey zone grows bigger. So no matter how you improve there is still place for a growth. So as a good human being, I'll strive to be better, stronger and more positive for 2010!

A gift from the Gift Exchange Party, boy God knows I need an Angel for 2010~

My 2010 New Year Resolutions has grows to 16, and I have 365 to achieve them all!
Happy Holiday to everyone and if you haven't seek forgiveness for 2009, do so, you'll feel better!
And if you want to improve yourself, make a list of Resolutions, even minor minor thing...things that has been in your closet for way way too long~

Merry Christmast(belated) and a Happy 2010!
Mum & Dad; I love you~

Certainties in life ~ is there such thing?

Just the other day I was having a conversation with friend about certainties in life. We were listing out the list of things we were certain of in life and things that we're not so sure. We were making a list, and was asking questions or things we would like to categorize as Certain Certified, Grey Zone and Dead Sure Not Certified. Ok here goes;

1. Best Football(yanks call them soccer!) Player in the world is Steven Gerrard! CC
2. Both of us are Straight and Proper men! CC
3. Man can multitask! DSNC
4. Elizabeth Hurley was still hot! GZ
5. That we wouldn't mind having Lizzie as our gf! CC
6. David Hassleholf needs to shave his chest! CC
7. Lindsay Lohan is crack and needs to start wearing them panties! CC
8. Yours sincerely got a lot of gfs. DSNC
9. Yours sincerely always uses a dumb ass excuses during break-ups! GZ(coz I still think telling the girl you're about to break up with that you love her and that you love another girl at the same time is ethically right. Come on now, she is going to lose the man she loves, a little sweeteners will help!)
10. That we are all alone in the universe! DSNC(Haven't you watched Starship Troopers?)

Ok, there is a lot more in the list but the point is, we can always be sure or certain about something at this moment but things might change dramatically in the next few years. For example, I could not guarantee my friend will not cross dress in the future, that he would steal his wife's under garments and wear them while enticing young men at pubs~yucks! Or that Lindsay Lohan would start to buy them undies and wear them and act normal again once her millions dry up and she realize she needs to grow up. Or both of us would turn down Lizzie if she wants a piece of us in the future; look she is mid forties pushing 50s. We wouldn't mind her now but imagine when she is in her sixties while we were entering our forties...yucks x 13!

This brings it nicely to the case of Lizzie(the asian version). She is 29 this year, a good age for women. She is hot x 12, she is smart(sales manager), she is intelligent and she is getting married soon! She was having some cold feet moments a few week back in regards to her impeding marriage. It seems to her that if she had chosen wrongly her life would end. However deep down she knows Joe(not his real name but who cares?) is a good guy, a responsible guy and a stabilizing factor in her life. Joe also has incredible patience, good manners and a decent education background. Though the good factors were incredibly high, she still has her doubts, insecurities and lots and lots of worries.

So what seems to be the problems then? Is it a love problem? Is it a commitment problem? Is it that Lizzie actually likes another person? Is it Joe is too plain and stable for her? Is it that she will need to give up the other 2 billion guys in this world for him? Is Joe not good enough for her? Or is it pure old before marriage cold feet syndrome that struck her?

I don't know, for once I don't know how to decipher her situation. All I can do as a friend, is to reassure her that marriage is a sacred thing, a contract between two people in love and the binding force for soulmates.
I also assure her that Joe is a good guy, come on, if a guy can love and take all the bull from Lizzie then he must be good. Ol'Jon try to be convincing, trying to be diplomatic and trying to assure Lizzie everything is going to be ok. Truth to be told, I don't know shit what is going to happen to her. In any separation case between couples, Love is not an issue. When 2 people of different background stay together they get to know each other well. And trust me it is not rosy everyday!

Anyway, I just want to point out that there is no certainties in life! If today Lizzie loves Joe and marry him, good for her! But if tomorrow she found out the love had changed then this is call the Uncertainties of Life.
Yes you hear me right, we can try but there is no certainties in life. When you're certain you marry when you're in doubt divorce!

So don't give too much thoughts on your choice in life, because the route you're certain today will be definitely different in the future. Just like how I think being a soldier would be cool at 10 but today I think it is a cack idea....so you have it! Live life at the present, not past not future...but at this moment. If you're dead certain you want that house, you buy it! If you're dead certain you like that car, you get it! If you're dead certain you lust over that girl, you shag her! Live in the present and life is certain!

Remember that!