Trouble is a friend? Today it is, at least today it is.....

Have you ever heard of Lenka's Trouble is a Friend? If you haven't it can only suggest two things.

1. You're an idiot
2. You live in a cave

Anyway, I somehow can relate to this song today.
It is a very bad day for me, personally I think it sucks. And tonight I will do a lot of self reflection and more self reflections on my actions, reactions and emotions.

It started with a miscalculate judgement to write in an e-mail relating some work stuff complaints. It ended up to be a mud-slinging affair with my colleague, same office just that he is at the next island cubicle. When I wrote the e-mail, I have a clear conscience, to relate a client's complain to the boss, and keeping him in the loop together with the Mini Boss. In any multi-national company, it would've been a direct straight to the point stuffs. No finger pointing, no ifs and buts, no offence meant and taken but here it is a bit difference. In the end, the Mini Boss have to step in and relate his side of the understanding. Bottom line is the Mini Boss is very diplomatic. He told me I've done nothing wrong and I've follow the right procedure and broken none of the company codes. However he deemed that I'm not being respectful to the other guy. At first I felt that he was bias and that he do not understand the severity of the complaint. After a good 2 hours pondering I can understand where he is coming from. My previous Mini Boss would've done the same thing as I've done albeit without CCing the person involved. Truth to be told, I disagree on his ways though it is perfectly right thing to do. I thought I would be cheeky enough to improvise and do it the correct way but at the same time keeping the person involve in the loop. However the person involved got defensive and things started to turn sour. I guess I can say that I did the correct thing but not the 'right' thing. The human touch was lacking and we're a small closely knit bunch of guys and not some big multinational corporation. So with this in mind, I shall heed Mini Boss advice to inform to the person involved with the complaints first then only go direct to the Boss. Politically I'm 100% right but Morally I'm 100% wrong. One bad fiasco....

Then it came to a client complain about support. To cut the story short, the mistake was made by myself and my close buddy Siew(you can look up for him in my previous postings or his blog at clayphotog.wordpress.com). You see a lapse of miscommunication meant that I'm involved in an e-mail barrage with my good friend Siew. I felt absolutely bad about it. As I'm new to the division, sometime I depended too much on the poor fella. He is one Technical Support and he needs to support 20 plus Sales Person. He made a mistake and ol'Jon did not double checked on it and follow 100% on his recommendations. I'm not blaming Siew for the mistakes, I'm paid my salary and I'm supposed to do a good job on my own. Recent happenings meant that I'm no longer the gun slinging, gung ho, 100% confident and cocky in a very good way as I want to be. Thus now I'm no longer pro-active to learn stuffs and no longer take the initiative to do stuffs. And all this contributed to this big mess now. I can understand Siew's frustration in his e-mail and blinded by my urge to defend my standpoint, I replied on top of his e-mail in order to clear my name citing my innocence and pin pointing that the mistake originated from Siew. A mistake is a mistake and I failed to see my own short-comings. Yes, he gave the wrong info, and ultimately I sold the wrong model due to my carelessness. Though I do not know why he is reluctant to reply the client's e-mail or response to their calls, I guess I'm as guilty as Siew in this fiasco, if not more! In the heat of the moment with an unstable emotion, I have screwed up a 5 years relation with Siew. He will be leaving our company by the end of the month(going to be a CEO in his own company) and I fear I'll not be able to salvage this bond. I'm 100% entitled to defend myself but I'm also 100% gullible that in doing so I might have lost a good friend. Second bad fiasco......

Lastly, it happened during a game of football after work. I was eager to go for football to shed off the kgs and of course try out my new sleeveless jersey. Even though facing the wrath of wifey, I decided to go anyway. Usually I'm a tough cookie. Hard but fair, tough but clean type of player. Yes occasionally I does some 'professional' fouls and when I was younger I was a talented but hot headed player, someone who the opposition can wind up easily and get myself sent off. Now that I'm with Silly Bean and Silly Boy is in my life, I tone down the aggressiveness a level or two. In conclusion I like it tough and rough during my footie game. There is this guy, Alan is his name if I'm not mistaken. He is actually an idiot who tackles like a drunk old lady and he has absolutely no skills, game intelligence or even creativity. What he has is a bunch of  puberty energy(he is mid 20s), incredible stamina and high tenacity. A deadly combination on the field! ol' Jon was having a good game today, drifting in and out the flanks, jinking pass players like they were 10 years old girls and was a constant threat to Alan's team. He then took it upon himself to 'rectify' the problem and in one incident he nearly caught my thigh with his high boot. I manage to get out of his reckless challenge and proceeded with an excellent pass that even Harry's(Tottenham's coach) wife would have buried it but alas he missed. Usually I would just walk away as I love tackling and I know sometimes players mistimed them. But not today, today I would dissed at Alan and told him that it was a 'Dangerous Tackle' and he should've been wiser. He kept quiet. 5 minutes later I dispossessed him cleanly and was about launch a diagonal ball to my striker until he decided to Shoulder Charged me from behind. I was stunned and he continued  to carry the ball and dribbling. I was about to explode and told him off. He responded that Football is a Contact sport, if I can't handle it, I should play ping-pong. How ironic?? My response? Ok, since you wanted it then you'll get it! At the same time, Mini Boss(who happens to play footie with me) told me to ignore him and he's not worth it. I continued as usual and in one air challenge, I manage to head the ball away from Alan and it is still bouncing. He raised his elbow and wanted to hit me on the face on the 2nd challenge. I thank God that I was off balance and his despicable act was even more apparent and all other players reprimanded him, even his own players. After that I just stay away from him as he is one crazy motherfarker. It started with a cocky diss at Alan, which I would usually not do and it turn a fantastic game in to the 3rd bad occasion.

I do not know why all this happen in a day. I hope God will tell me why but I kept thinking, if 3 people find me untenable, does it means I'm wrong somehow? I would like to be given a chance to start 11th of August 2010 again if I could. And perhaps I can handle it much better. First time in a long time ol'Jon regrets his actions, reactions and emotions.....sometimes it is good to know you're wrong. You learn more that way and you see things from different perspective.....I'll strive to learn and improve my EQ and hopefully the day 3 bad occasions will not happen again!