A matter of self reflection?

Ok now, it is the 5th day of 2010 and things are going quite well at the moment. The dour and drab 2009 has passed, the misery the disappointment and the underachieving year was over. 2010 is the salvation, a renewed hope for a better future, a better year ahead and a cracking time in a new year.

ol'Jon has a refreshing new energy, I've looking forward to work, I'm very motivated in my work and strangely I'm very very positive about my position in Keyence(my company) for a long time. Most the negative purge and thoughts has been banished, I'm in a perfect Zen state, peaceful yet hungry, motivated and positive and generally a good buzz about the new year!

All this might come down to the fact that I've achieved 2 of my 16 resolutions for the year 2010 in the first 5 days of 2010. If you follow my blogs, 2009 has been an overwhelmingly under-achieving year for someone like me. Someone with high ambitions, high ego and generally set a high standard for himself! So to achieve 12.5% of my 2010 target in 1.37% of the days in 2010 is a real morale booster.

Though I cannot share with you the accomplished missions due to sensitivity issues, morality issues and personal issues, I can safely say it feels good to get things rolling in such a fabulous fashion! As they say the sky is always darkest before dawn, my resolution #12 was accomplished on the first day of 2010. Though a very confident person, I've never had much hope of getting the #12 resolution sorted out the way it went.
It was so smooth and natural that it makes me think why didn't I've done it earlier?

Another mission accomplished for 2010 is resolution #5. I've made it a point to be a bit laid back for 2010. I should not care so much about things that is going to happen. I should also not care so much if a plan goes awry or something goes wrong. I used to be a stuck-up guy. Be it work or play, I always demand 100% and will worry a lot and give a lot of suggestions. For example, I'm so used to be a leader that I will always 'command' people to do certain stuffs, to check in on them worrying they cannot cope with the given task. My intention is 100% good but my execution is flawed. I give people the impressions that I'm bossy, that I'm always right and I'm always dishing out instructions and that I'm always; My Way or The Highway type of person. You see my problem is I cared too much about things, which is good if it is in work or school but sometimes it shadows me into recreation stuffs as well. In truth 'My Way' has won me numerous and countless admirers but also get me a decent amount of people hating the way I function.

I realize this is bad for me, that I can demand 100% from myself and others during work but I cannot apply the same to friends. Some hated the way I work but was shadowing the hatred waiting for the correct moment to strike. I felt hurt and sad, I was down and out, cursing them for keeping the discontent so long. However after much reflection, I realize I cannot please everyone and the meaning of group activities is that all is equal. I cannot be bossy or a leader even though it was for the overall good. I just need to be a member and everyone need to take responsibility. I'm not a savior, not a hero but just a friend. I worry too much and become stuck up.

Working and friends are different, we are paid to work while we are paying to have activities with friends.
So after much thinking, I decided for 2010 I need to relax a little, and let others take responsibility for a change and generally just enjoy myself being a mere participant. You see when other people start to dissect your contribution and pin point your wrong doings, you should start to realise there is something very wrong.
Of course you can choose to 'unfriend' them but truth is they might be 15% right! So you cannot discount the fact. So for 2010, I choose to be a participant not the stuck up ramboesque leader I used to be.

Ahem, back to the topic of resolution #5. This coming 22nd of January 2010, I'll going camping with my friends at Penang Forest Reserve. And for the first time in a long time, I'm not organizing the event I'm participating. It is a relieve you know, and I'm glad I'll be letting some other capable people to manage while I'll just be a participant. It feels nice actually, and I'm sure I'm in good hand and will enjoy the trip nonetheless. So you see, being less stuck-up and not insisting being a leader in a group of friends is a good thing, and I'm happy to achieve it! I'm not going to think of all the potential set-backs, potential mishap or anything, I'm just taking the ride and hoping to enjoy it. You should try it too, if you're like me!

Resolution #12 was achieved due to persistent and good strategy and Resolution #5 was a mere good ol' logic thinking~

There will be many hurdles in life, but to each problem there lies an unlikely solution, the catch is that we need to understand what we want in life and what we can achieve. With this 2 clear objectives, most if not all problems is solvable!

Of course problems faced by Joan Soon Yi Jia of turning into Angelina Jolie is a pipe dream. And problems faced by Baskin Lee(she has got red spots) will never go away. But as a good capable human, we adapt and survive...cheers 2010!

I'm sure I'll love 2010~ hope you feel the same too, adios!