hot & cold

The current weather is bothering Ethan tremendously, it was heartbreakingly chilly on rainy days which makes him feeling depressed and lonely, and then there is the hot & humid weather to wreck havoc on him, making him sweat profusely and uncomfortable. Seems like moderate weather is what Ethan is looking for. Not too raining with grey clouds and endless hours of dripping rains over the horizon, not too hot either with the sun baking his skins and tanned him even further.

The weather it seems perfectly sums up Monica's treatment of Ethan. Hmmm, Monica oh Monica, the one girl that are more than able to make Ethan fall head over heels for her. You see, Monica is the sort of girl that Ethan really fancy, sweet, funny, smart, independent and of course very very pretty. No doubt there is girls that are sweeter, funnier, smarter, more independent and prettier that Ethan knows and go out with, but Monica was just different. Ethan got the feelings of spending the mornings with Monica cuddling and playing under the comforter, sipping the unsweeten black coffee(no need sugar as she is that sweet) everytime Ethan is fully sweeten by Monica's charm and sense of humor. He also get the feeling of peace and serenity while watching her sleep, snooze deep into the dreamland while quietly admiring her silly antics while asleep. Ethan was deeply into this girl, this seemingly perfect girl; Monica. Until he knows her better that is.....

Ethan is a professional executive, relatively young and relatively successful. He is also a smooth operator, who is comfortable to strike conversation with any girls he fancies. He dates a lot too and can be considered an "experience" lad. Ethan also loves fast cars, football and the occasional outdoor activities like campings, fishings and swimming. While Ethan is also a fillial son, a family man with respect and love for his lovely parents and sibling. Seems like he got it all, seems like life was just perfect for him and the world is there for his taking. He never seems to get any trouble courting, getting and ultimately bedding any girls that he wants. He is charming and sweet and caring and responsible and give a sense of security...all traits modern women are looking for. There seems no stopping him with his neat smart work outfit, his fast car and his smooth skills; until he met Monica...he fell flat on his face! After a disastrous break-up(for once it is the girl who ask for it; not the egoistic Ethan), he vowed not to fall in love again, he vowed he would only date, his modus of operanti is F*ck and Forget and forever not involve in relationships that needs emotional, spiritual and mental commitment. Until until until....he met Monica, he fell flat and has no idea how to handle such an unique girl...

Monica has no shortage of admirers, has tonnes of friends and had a good life. There is no reason for her to commit to a relationship. She loves the freedom, the datings and the finer things of living. She is uber cool, sweet, outgoing and take cares of herself. And by fate Ethan got to know her 3 years ago at an exhibition. Ethan, then a junior exec was bored to death sitting in his booth when out of no where the most beautiful and sweet girl walked over and offer some sweets to him. The seed was sowed, the first impression was fantastic.... As the year pass, the friendship got stronger and the dates more often, he fell for her. Slowly but surely this girl gives Ethan the reason to love again, makes Ethan realise there are still beautiful things in life and give him the strengh to wake up every morning to face the world. Ethan didn't knew it earlier, but slowly but surely the feelings got stronger and clearer.

The 'experience' Ethan then took a great gamble to tell Monica he likes her and was asking about whether the feelings was mutual. He did not hope much but Monica told him she likes him too but was not ready for a relationship. Now this puzzle Ethan greatly, and it really bothers him a lot too. Since the "confession" things was like the weather, Hot & Cold between them. Sometimes Monica would not text Ethan for weeks only to send a short warm text when all seems gloom. She just knew the time to cheer Ethan up. Though to be fair, Ethan was also nonchalant about it as he is keeping his emotions in check and would not text Monica as often as he would like it to be. There seems to be a mental block and try as he may, Ethan cannot bring himself to understand what Monica wants for her life. All Ethan could do is to focus on his job, his family and his friends. He stopped dating and though didn't put in any hope on Monica he secretly wishes he would one day find what he craves for.

It is not all rosy and simple as Ethan and Monica shared some intimate moment, the hugs, the kisses and the hand holding though brief but very much appreciated by Ethan. This is where it got all confusing for Ethan, when he dates other girls, he held their hands, kiss their lips, hold their waist and if the mood permits; a good make out! But it was always perceived as an activities with no responsibility or commitment needed. When he does it to other girls it seems normal and he wouldn't give a hoot about it. Ethan kissed Monica once, and he cannot get her out of his head....is he crazy? I would think he is in love.....but poor Ethan has to endure hot & cold for a long time until he has the courage to let it go...coz there is no one worth waiting in this fast pace, realistic and material world...ppl just move on! Ethan would like to just do it, just go for the jugular and risk everything even Monica's friendship for his pursue of her but Ethan was just not the smooth talking, charming fella he used to be, he is broken man, hurt by the uncertainties..

If tomorrow never comes, Ethan just want to be able to live his life the way he wanted.....with Monica to watch the sun rise for one last time.....because she is worth it!